TAYAH, THE INTERVIEW

This interview was performed on the patio of my home in Decatur, Georgia on April 28, 2021 at 3:00 PM. At 22, Tayah Powell aka Tay is long and elegant. She speaks quickly, loosely, and with confidence in her ideas. Everything flows forth with the same eloquence, whether it be poetry or profanity. She warns me that she’s prepared to ask me questions back and put the onus on me to be just as interesting as she poses herself to be. The hot afternoon sun beats down on the big black patio umbrella, two brown bodies glisten underneath it. We sit, Tay with water and lip gloss in hand, and prepare to delve into topics spanning from family, legacy, longevity, Truman Capote, how to get dressed, style, solitude, Young Thug, lemon pepper wings, Howard University, and more. 

Najee AR Fareed: Who are you? How old are you? Where are you from? What do you do? 

Tayah Powell: I am Tayah Powell, I prefer Tay. I am 22 years old. I am from Scottdale, Georgia originally then the Glenwood area and now more farther on the East, I’d say the Stone Mountain area. And I do everything.  

Najee AR Fareed: What is the last thing you watched? 

Tayah Powell: The last thing I watched…

Najee AR Fareed: Like on a screen, doesn’t have to be a movie. Could be a TV show. Could be YouTube.  

Tayah Powell: The last thing I laid my eyes on… oh! It was definitely a wig review on YouTube. 

Najee AR Fareed: We are going to do a quick word association. The idea is to respond with a word as quick as you possibly can. 

Tayah Powell: Okay. One word? 

Najee AR Fareed: One word. Or a phrase. 

Tayah Powell: Okay! I can do phrases. 

Najee AR Fareed: Whatever just comes to mind. Ready, set, go… fashion. 

Tay: Police. 

NAF: Clothes. 

Tay: Home. 

NAF: Art. 

Tay: Life. 

NAF: Mecca. 

Tay: Howard. 

NAF: Change. 

Tay: Now. 

NAF: What was the last book you read? 

Tay: The last book I read is What The Buddha Taught. 

NAF: Who wrote that? 

Tay: Before I butcher the author’s name, I’m just going to plead the fifth. (Walpola Rahula Thero) 

NAF: Okay, can you just say it again? 

Tay: What The Buddha Taught. It’s a book constructed around Buddhist concepts, but in a really explanatory way, not necessarily a book of persuasion or prophecy. Literally about Buddhism and Buddhist principles. 

NAF: What is the last song you played? 

Tay: It’s so funny you asked me that. I was thinking about that on the way here. I was like, “what if he asks me what I was listening to on the way here?” The last song I listened to was… I believe it was a song off of Barter 6… lemme see what it was [pulls out phone and goes to Spotify]. I can’t lie of course. Oh it was “Power.” So it wasn’t on Barter 6 but it was Thug nonetheless. It was “Power “ by Young Thug. 

NAF: Would you rather be a tree, a rock, or a cloud? And why? 

Tay: Hmmmm. 

NAF: Did I say and or or? 

Tay: You said or. You said “and why?” 

NAF: *laughs* 

Tay: I definitely think I would be a tree. I would be a tree.  My immediate reason would be longevity. Being here through the storm, I was thinking about a rock moving and a cloud not being here tomorrow. But a tree will definitely be here tomorrow. 

NAF: That’s valid. I did not think about that at all actually. 

NAF: Langston Hughes has this idea of the Negro Artist and the Racial Mountain. This idea of having to climb the racial mountain to get to the other side and to be recognized as a true artist outside of our communities, even with the white community or the worldwide community. Battling the idea that sometimes even black people do not recognize our own artists until they get white recognition. Do you feel like recognition is something you struggle with and who you create for? What is your target audience? 

Tay: My experience with recognition is kind of inverted in a way. I haven't been working all this time with people’s back to me, waiting on them to recognize me and my craft and the things I create but instead I find myself recognized everywhere on every level. Since I was a little girl it would be people telling me they felt something special about me here and something special about me there. But I was definitely, definitely, definitely, unable to believe that at a lot of points in my life. Now I feel like people’s recognition is forcing me to recognize myself and what I do because if it wasn't for people screaming at me, about how “fucking beautiful and perfect I am” and me not seeing it, I’d end up looking stupid every time. I think recognition is not difficult for me to obtain but it is difficult for me to abstract for myself. Definitely. Definitely. Definitely. In terms of who I want the recognition from? I really want to say some really cool shit about “it girls like me” but I really do this shit for the little girl in me. That is who I wanna impress. I really want little girls like me, who may have come some fucked up shit or foster care or parents who struggled with addiction or things of the sort, things I can relate to. I definitely want those little girls’ approval. I want them to think I’m cool as fuck. 

NAF: If you could be any movie, which movie would you be? 

Tay: If I could be a movie, what movie would I be?  Unfortunately I am not as well versed in film as I should be, especially as a young black creative, but I think my first answer would be Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Definitely Breakfast At Tiffany’s. 

NAF: Have you ever read the book by Truman Capote? 

Tay: No, I never read the book! I heard it was an amazing book, of course the book was better. 

NAF: Well, I’ve never read it. There was this joke, I forgot what movie it was but there was this joke and they were mocking people. Like, “no way has the read the book, no one fucking reads Truman Capote.” 

Tay: *laughs* Not me caught up, I am the stereotype. That’s fucked up.  

NAF: I didn’t read it either. I’m not finna pretend I read Truman Capote. 

NAF: If you could be any song, what song would you be? 

Tay: If I could be any song, what would I personify? Something longggg.

NAF: Like how long? 

Tay: Like a 7-minute song. Like on some The Gap Band shit bro. Like on some Earth, Wind, & Fire shit. A happy, long song. Really joyous but mysterious song. I am thinking, I am thinking. I am probably thinking too much. The song that I will be is… this is probably the hardest question I have ever been asked. Instead of regurgitating the question I will go with my first answer would have been “Nakamarra” by Hiatus Kaiyote. Joyous, smooth, long. A really happy song, something about love. 

NAF: I realized a few years ago that a lot of people do not like long songs. Especially in Atlanta where the trap is like the gospel. 

Tay: Them minute and 30 seconds songs. 

NAF: Exactly, anthem type deals. I was listening to this song, it was called… *pulls up spotify on my phone* 

Tay: Yeah, get the facts right. 

NAF: It’s on my playlist… *plays first three seconds*  It’s called “Float On” by The Floaters. It’s some 70s ass all-male band. I was over somebody’s house and they were just playing the song and I was just listening to it and listening to it. 

Tay: The beginning was very beautiful. 

NAF: It’s a very beautiful song but after like 8 minutes, I was like damn, “this song is still going.” Turns out the song is around 12 minutes long. 

Tay: *laughs* what the fuck. 

NAF: I know! I was just thinking that I miss that a little bit. 

Tay: Just really basking in that moment. 

NAF: There are a few newer artists with longer songs. Sometimes when you listen to an artist, people would say that this person’s “magnum opus” is this really long song. People would say Frank Ocean and “Pyramids”, Kanye and “Runaway.” Long ass songs like that. I feel like there has been a distaste (for long songs) outside of people who want to appreciate music as an art. I want long songs to come back as a commercial thing rather than just being an artistic expression. 

Tay: I agree, I agree. I think that was oriented around music having been live at some point. I swear I think I do. Because there is no way that you can get an orchestra of people rocking the fuck out and are really vibing and really making art get them to be like, “okay we’ll stop it here.” 

NAF: It’s hard to imagine a live band- 

Tay: Really going the nuts. 

NAF: Inside of a studio and then stopping at 2 minutes and going, “okay this is cool.” 

Tay: I even think some of the songs were meant to be about 3-4 minutes long. It’s really difficult, especially with the state music used to be in, to rip themselves away from the groove like that.

NAF: I think about music and the way it was played in the 70s. You would hear it in the club and you would hear it in the car. And if you bought the record, you would hear it in your home. All three of those are very leisurely activities. If you’re in the club, vibing out on acid, just tripping balls, and you’re just gone… it’s just a completely different vibe. 

Tay: I never thought about it like that, how music used to be played and what effect it has on the type of music that is being made. That is really interesting. 

NAF: Today, there is an urgency, I’m listening to music to fill in this task between this (other) task. 

Tay: Yesss. I also think that the shortage… well, not the shortage of music. There is a surplus of music of course. The shortened duration of songs is because of the surplus of artists. And even though that’s not a bad thing, I think as many people should be able to create as much as they want, there are enough perspectives out here for all art to be admired or worshipped in some way. I just think it had a lot to do with so much. Oh my god, I never really thought out this before. I never thought about this before. 

NAF: It seems like, with the tree and the song, longevity is something you have on your mind, lasting for a long time. 

Tay: Definitely. I really wanted that tattoo. I took it off my tattoo list a couple days ago but I really wanted “Built to Last” somewhere on me.

NAF: Is there an end point you ever had in sight? Just for your life in general, I don’t even mean death. I just mean goals, is there ever a point where you’d get there and feel like, “this is where I’m at, this is what I’ve been lasting for.” 

Tay: Definitely. I do not have a very specific organization in mind that I want to create and maintain, but I do know that it deals with service. I think I will feel like I’m finished when I feel like I have helped enough people. Even my end goals in life are oriented around assisting, educating, and really providing for people. I really want to retire in Paris and fucking profess at a school somewhere after getting my doctorates and fucking duck off somewhere in like… I was about to say mesothelioma. 

NAF: *laughs* That’s not a place is it? That’s one of those diseases from one those fucking commercials. 

Tay: *laughing* Yes, that is so funny, but even my settle down things are not oriented around kicking by myself on an island with my kids. My settling down is still providing a service to people, someway and somehow. It’s definitely service, even when I think about the end goal of the brand I’m starting, I’m thinking about making it big enough to back organizations and back children’s rights committees and back funding for foster children. Which I don’t think I noticed until this interview so that’s pretty interesting to learn about. 

NAF: I feel that a lot, even with the Save Zone 6 shit I’m doing. I know I’m not causing these problems but I feel an immense guilt. I feel as though it’s on me, not only on me, but on me to try and do something about it. Even the fact that I have to move to New York to go to NYU- 

Tay: That’s so crazy. Congratulations. Again and again and again. 

NAF: Thank You. I just feel a slight tinge of guilt for leaving. Most of that is built on service and the idea that what I do for other people is what makes me feel like anything I’m doing is worthwhile. I am always trying to make sure that I am creating for the people that are coming from the places that I come from. When I say place, I do not mean a physical place. Moreso a condition or a mindset. It is about more than giving resources but creating opportunities, the opportunities that were not there for me. That is what I’m trying to do in the future. And InshaAllah I’m getting there. But I definitely feel the whole service based pedagogy, feeling as though you’ve made it when you’ve fully realized what you can do for other people. We’re in sync there. 

Tay: We’re feeling each other there. Question time, what says yes to NYU? What is the yes, I heard a couple of maybe nots but what is the yes? 

NAF: The yes is that they’re giving me a full scholarship and they’re giving me money to go. *laughs* I feel like going there puts me in a position where I can learn from established, working writers, doing the type of things that I want to do. It’s a very well staffed program, it’s very… 

Tay: That shit fye. *laughs*

NAF: Yeah, I just think they have a lot of resources and I feel like once I’m done with the program I’d be able to not just do whatever I want, I already feel like I can do whatever I want, but it’d go back to that recognition thing. I’d be able to go into spaces and I’d have this badge that would say, “this is a big accomplishment and I have this now and you don’t have to listen to me but you have to hear what I have to.” That is a really big thing for me, I’ve always felt like I have been in spaces that have marginalized me, especially as a black writer. I was nervous when I was submitting my application. The story I wrote to get into NYU was about three black teens in East Atlanta, going to go get some lemon pepper wings after school. And a whole bunch of bullshit happens. But when I was submitting the story, I was thinking to myself, who the fuck up there is going to understand what I am writing about. Who is going to understand the way they speak or the allusions. There aren’t enough people like me. 

Tay: I agree. Especially being from this area, being raised in this area, That’s why I left to go to school. Where did you go to undergrad?  

NAF: I went to Columbus State University in Columbus, Georgia. That was one the craziest parts about getting into a prestigious school like NYU. There were around 1000 applicants for my program and only about 20 people got accepted. So that’s around 2%? I think? I’m not good at math. 

Tay: It’s giving 2%. 

NAF: Of those 20, I like about 8 got full scholarships that I did. So that’s about 0.8%? For them to read my story and think that it’s the one of the best if not the best, that was really gratifying. I graduated with a middle of the road ass GPA from a middle of the road ass School. If someone would I have told me I was going to get a full scholarship to NYU with a 2.86 GPA, I’d have been, “okayyy, sure.” And now that I’ve done that, I feel like I can do anything. Most of the time, I’m my biggest doubter. Even things like being on Good Morning America. They’d pass and I’d be like “damn that really happened.” And most accomplishments I’ve had, I’d have this nobody cares, keep working mentality. Getting into NYU was the first time I stopped and took a breath and said “damn that really something.” 

Tay: “I might have snapped.” 

NAF: Exactly! It changed my life trajectory. It changed what I have to do. It changed where I have to live. 

Tay: That’s such a shift. 

NAF: Yeah, most accomplishments may put a few thousand dollars in pocket, something to put on your resume. But now, I have to move. But back to you, we talked about me for too long. 

Tay: I told you, the way I still have more questions. 

NAF: How do you get dressed? 

Tay: How do I get dressed? It’s actually a very calculated process. Essentially, I throw things together. But the way in which I throw things together is very calculated. For example, when it comes to the components of my top, bottom, shoes… I am really big on balance on all levels. Excluding today, it is hot as fuck! Essentially if I have on something small, I need to counteract it with something big. I am a large shirt with a miniskirt kinda girl with boots to level the skin that the miniskirt shows. Little things in that vicinity. If I am wearing a tiny top and large pants, it really is based on balance. Even when thinking of the colors I’m utilizing while getting dressed, for example, if I am wearing something that has a particular luster or particular shine it gives me permission to wear it with other metallics. I can wear it with silver! I can wear it with gold! I don’t really like gold but in the case that I do, I am now able to do that. I have a very basic set of rules then I throw everything together. I really like complementary colors, but complementary in shade. Whether it be cool toned or warm, I definitely incorporate (it) into my dress. I want it to look really casual though. Nonetheless, even if I am the most dressed up girl in the room, the word is effortless. Effortless. Effortless. Effortless. For real. Before I do anything else, I root my clothing in the environment that I will be in. I need whatever the fuck I’m wearing to be comfortable. If I’m doing a little less walking, then maybe I can be a little less comfortable. But it’s based on the atmosphere or how I’m feeling that day. If I’m feeling feminine that day. Or if I’m feeling down, like sad as fuck, my clothes tend to be a little bigger. When I feel on top of the world, I tend to wear a little less clothes. It’s rooted in simplicity, but calculated nonetheless. 

NAF: Do you feel free? 

Tay: As free as I’ve ever felt. Not as free as I can be, but as free as I’ve ever felt. 

NAF: What does self love mean to you? 

Tay: So far to me, the biggest theme self love as translated itself as to me has been solitude. Being my own friend, my own therapist. My own partner. My own, everything. Honestly. It’s honestly self-sufficiency to me. I don’t think we deserve as human beings to live our lives fighting for self-sufficiency. Codependency has been a major theme for me to tackle recently. And of course, if I’m tackling codependency, I’m forced to tackle how I stand on my own two feet. What I do for myself, what I think I do for myself, what I’m tricking myself into thinking that I’m doing for myself and not doing for myself. Definitely, definitely, definitely has taught me a lot about myself. That said self-sufficiency has guided me to a lot more self-care. That’s essentially what it did, taught me to detach my unhealthy approaches to relationships whether it be platonic, romantic, or what the fuck ever. I got to a point in my life when I was letting people make decisions for me and letting people tell me how to feel. The worst part about that, wasn’t that I was doing the act itself but that I convinced myself for a couple years that I wasn’t doing it. And I had to be by myself for a minute. Through being by myself, I’ve never fucked with myself as hard as I do now. I always had a really big problem with tackling my appearance and a sense of dysmorphia. What I think I look like vs what people tell me I look like vs the pictures I take vs the clothes I wear. All of those things have been resolved with this solitude. Not needing someone else to tell me that. Not needing to hear it from another mouth.  

NAF: There are four items needed to summon you from another world, four items are put into one of those hex things, four physical items. What four items would it be? 

Tay: And they need to get me up outta there, like guaranteed Tayah gon go? 

NAF: Yeah. A portal is gonna come and just scoop you and take you away. 

Tay: Okay. I would say my tarot deck. I would say lip gloss. I would say needle and thread. And the fourth physical item would be some sort of device that would never stop playing music. Like it don’t matter wherever the fuck I go, the music keeps playing. 

NAF: What is style to you? 

Tay: Style is the future. I know that sounds cliche, but hear me out. Style is aiming to do something that has not been done before. I think the innovation that comes with style, no matter who the fuck is getting dressed, is oriented around the future. Style has always been oriented around the future, not fashion which is oriented around the past. Style is always about thinking about what you can do with said past fashions to make it new. 

NAF: Every time I think of style I think about this particular instance. I feel like I say this shit way too much but whatever. I met Neal Adams, the comic book artist, at a comic book convention in 2014. He is responsible for redefining Batman into what he is today rather than what he was in the 50s and 40s. He drew Green Lantern and the X-Men. Pretty much, he worked for Marvel and DC for a long time. I was super in his face, nerding out and shit. I remember he tells me the way he draws his characters is not correct. They are not an accurate reflection of real life. He said, “style is what you do wrong.” And style is like your wrong take on the world. When you think about style and fashion, clothes are first and foremost a necessity and a utility to shield ourselves and keep ourselves warm and comfortable. When you think about that, the assortment of fabrics and textures is not essential. We don’t need all of that. The style comes in and everyone can add their own flavor. It’s an expression. An expression of things we do wrong. It is a very cool thing, that we can do something wrong and it can be expressing ourselves, and through that it becomes right. 

Tay: Really cool take. It makes me think about how many cool innovations have come by accident. That’s such a refreshing take. 

NAF: What is your perfect meal and who would it be with? 

Tay: My perfect meal… I would smoke first. I think that would be a good prep to the wild shit I’m about to say. I can’t decide if I want some of the most hood shit in my life…. Honestly I know the answer to this. I would get a ten-piece combo. Half-lemon pepper. Maybe half-honey lemon pepper. But I’m thinking half-lemon pepper. And the other half would be medium wings with lemon pepper sprinkles. But if I do medium with lemon pepper sprinkles then ima need to do honey lemon pepper on the other side. I need that equilibrium there. I would want slightly overcooked french fries. Seasoning salt and powdered ranch on said french fries. Extra lemon pepper seasoning just for shits and giggles on said wings. Peach and lemonade mixed to drink. 

NAF: That’s the meal I eat almost everyday. Dipping sauce? 

Tay: Bleu cheese, definitely. What am I heathen? 

NAF: For sure. 50 cents for the extra, at that. 

Tay: Yo, if I dip these french fries in there and it ain’t enough for these wings? Who I gotta talk to? Who manager I gotta talk to? 

NAF: The second part of the question is asking who would you eat the wings with. 

Tay: My father. He passed when I was 6. If I had it my motha fucking way, I woild be eating wings with my daddy. 

NAF: Where would the perfect place be? 

Tay: The perfect place for me to be munching on some wings with my daddy would be my loft style apartment in downtown Atlanta. Hopefully there is something very vulgar playing that my dad wouldn’t appreciate. 

NAF: What is your biggest fear? 

Tay: The answer to that question has changed so much over the last few years of my life. At first, my biggest fear was death. It is a really unrealistic fear. Not only is it coming no matter, there is a true uttering beauty to find in death. I thought that was such a dark thing to believe a few years ago but there is something refreshing about it. Of course not a planned death or murder or something like that. But my fears have fluctuated from things that are completely bound to happen to things that I am in control of. And now that my fears are things I am in control of, I do not validate nor do I support those fears. If I can control it, I am not afraid of it. Right now though, on my life, I ain’t scared of shit. With the tribulations going on in my life right now, with this being one of the lowest points of my life, these days… I am not afraid of shit. I have no fear right now. 

NAF: What is your biggest freedom? 

Tay: Definitely eloquence. Definitely, definitely, definitely words. Definitely, definitely, definitely words. My biggest freedom is  being able to express myself whether that be with a word with 5 syllables or saying fuck three times in a row. I am real big on the way I talk to people and the way people talk to me. My biggest freedom is being able to say whatever the hell I want to because I am smart and I’m ghetto. 

NAF: What was the first place you felt like you belonged? 

Tay: Howard University. I knew immediately. Howard University. Howard Uni-Fucking-Versity my nigga. I got to visit through this really cool program in high school that was only available at Towers geared toward underprivileged and underserved students into college but keeping them there so they can get a four year degree. It was completely free. I was on the executive board. We went all the way up the east coast. I knew I wanted to go to Howard, before we even went. But I literally told them they could just leave me there when I got off the bus. 

NAF: What was the process like, of getting in and staying in? 

Tay: Because I was in foster care, a lot of those shortcuts were easier to find as far as funding for school. I initially got a 5000 dollar academic scholarship. That wasn’t shit but it was enough to make me boo-hoo cry.  I graduated high school with 3.3 GPA, but I was in like 9 clubs my nigga. I played tennis, I danced all four years of high school on some majorette shit, I was part of the fucking Technology Student association, the fucking FBLA, a bunch of shit. I think that’s really what saved my ass. Scholastically, I did not really care about school. I liked school because I liked seeing people, I am a very social person. I thought that would be a setback, before getting into Howard. A few months after I got that academic scholarship, I got a full four year grant just because I did not meet the expected family contribution. Essentially because I was broke as fuck, they were giving me this money and I had priority to this money because I was in foster care. The process of paying was cool. The process of applying and getting in was nerve wracking. I had a lot of teachers tell me to prepare a plan B. 

NAF: What other universities were you looking at? 

Tay: Manhattan Marymount College, in New York. And Soku University of America in Aliso Viejo. California. 

NAF: So nowhere in Georgia? 

Tay: No where in Georgia. I knew I did not belong here, ever since I was a little girl. I knew I was too big for wherever the fuck I was. I was too big for Bethune Middle School. I was too big for Towers. I just wanted to find like-minded individuals. I knew I wanted to travel. I did not know I wanted to go to an HBCU. I did not know what an HBCU was until the second semester of my freshman year of high school. I knew I wanted to go to a PWI, but I did not think I’d find an HBCU in any major city. Which is stupid because Clark Atlanta was right down the street. It was in Atlanta though, so it was my last priority. I wanted to go to Soku because they accepted 100% demonstrated need, subject to inspection or what the fuck ever. I visited Soku and Howard back to back. I got into a fly-in program so they literally flew me out to LAX, it’s about an hour from LA so that was cool. But it was a week after my Howard trip and I knew where I was going to go. They were so welcoming and nice. It was a beautiful campus. But it wasn’t Howard. Manhattan did not fall through, I probably would have fell in love with NY. 

NAF: DC was a nice vibe though. 

Tay: It was beautiful. It was beautiful. Some never before seen shit. It was so black. It was so black. When I had got off the bus the first time I visited, I really realized that I belonged there. I saw this girl with a mesh tee shirt on. And I saw this bald girl with blonde hair. And I saw this girl with a face tat. It was so many different types of black people in one and I had never no shit like that, a day in my fucking life. It was the first place where I remember being like, I belong here for real. 

NAF: Go to the future or the past? 

Tay: Definitely go to the future. Definitely the future. The past has nothing for me. 

NAF: What’s your thought process when creating? 

Tay: I think too much when creating, I think way too much when creating. I try to put myself in a predicament to create based on how I feel. When I’m sewing or creating something or even leading others with a creative hand I try to do it based on how I feel but often I am unable to tap into my feelings so it makes it kinda hard. I try to think about what I feel is my answer. It is so difficult for me sometimes, to even actively say, “this is how I feel.” I find myself logicizing how I feel that, why I feel that, how I came about feeling that way, and never acknowledging that I feel that way. Twitter would say it's an Aquarius thing.  

NAF: Recently, I read a book titled The Institutionist by Colson Whitehead. He’s an African-American author. He had this idea about a perfect elevator. What would an elevator look like if it was constructed from the perspective of the elevator itself? He was interested in answering the question, how would an elevator construct itself to perfectly move a group of people from one place to another directly above it. I was wondering if we could apply to clothes or any other creative ventures you may have. If clothes could be designed and assembled from the perspective of the clothing itself, what do you think it would look like? 

Tay: *thinking*

NAF: It’s not an easy question to answer. 

Tay: It’s not. 

NAF: He did not even really answer the question in the book. 

Tay: It’s a beautiful question though. It is a selfless question, it forces me to remove myself. I think it would force me to get back to basics. Or force clothes to get back to basics. The basics that clothing is needed to cover, assuming clothes knew it needed to cover. I think that it would all boil back down to the basics. It would be about covering, it would be about preservation, all over again. I’d have to think about that. Thoroughly. 

NAF: How does it feel to be up for graduation from Howard University, since you’re up for graduation in a few weeks? 

Tay: It literally feels like a deep breath. The deepest breath, it feels like I have not been breathing for four years and now I am finally breathing. A deep… clearing… make space for breath. It is relieving. So relieving. It kind of reminds me of what we were talking about earlier, “nobody cares, work harder.” That was the definition of my collegiate career. That was what my collegiate career consisted of. Breaking barriers, beating my goals ass for real. Never looking up at all. Now I’m looking up, taking a breath. And like, damn! I’m just taking a deep breath and looking around after 4 years. I am the culprit. I had the opportunity to bask in what I was doing but I made the choice not to because I wasn’t used to doing things so it felt like I was doing nothing when I was doing things for real. Ranging from my Vice Presidency with the Public Relations Student Society or being on the Dean’s List since my second semester at Howard University. Working with all these major brands: working with Adobe, working with Rent The Runway, working with D'usse, working with Courvoisier,  working with BPCM. There are so many things that I would not have fathomed as a little girl. If you were to tell little Tayah, “oh yeah girl, you’ll do this. You’ll be part of this club. And you’ll be paid to party sometimes by liquor brands and you’re gonna make stuff and you’re gonna learn how to sew.” I wouldn’t have believed it. I woke up today and it was surreal. Graduating college is not a big deal to everyone, but this the single biggest achievement of my life. Only because I did it. I did it. I did it. From paying for it, to busting my ass to cover housing, to working 40 hours a week as a full time student. I overcame all of these adversities. It feels like I can take a fucking breath. 

NAF: Freedom or free will? 

Tay: It’s definitely, what’s one without the other. Free will the ability to do whatever the fuck I want. Freedom is the space, the permission to do whatever I want. So I guess, what is free will without freedom? I can exist on whatever terms I want with my free will, but what terms am I existing on if I do not have freedom? If I had a preference between the two, I would choose free will. Doing whatever the fuck I want. 

NAF: What’s next? 

Tay: Free will. I have my freedom now. 

NAF: Thank you for coming. 

Tay: It’s been a pleasure, I got to know myself a bit more today.